A pain in my…..

I picked something up off the floor without crying. That is my major achievement of the day. This morning I turned around and my neck went weird. Thinking it was a crick I attempted to loosen it with some neck roles, this led to me making odd squeaking noises on the train to work. When I got to work and tried to remove my coat, it was a new level of pain. I have since chowed down on ibuprofen and I’m wearing a heat patch. Stupid nerve, ow ow ow fucking ow! So I can’t turn my head to the right, its not like cars come from that direction or anything important.

"They're not very monotonous" Laura, she meant monogamous. Apparently Vanessa would like to be in a monotonous relationship.

Top 5 Songs

Kimya Dawson- Tire swing

The Beatles- I want to hold your hand

Antsy Pants- Tree Hunger

Kimya Dawson- Loose Lips

Regina Spektor- Fidelity

(Can you tell I watched Juno last night?)

Happy days.....

Is it wrong that I walked past someone’s desk last week and saw a new Banana Yoshimoto book and wanted to steal it?

Nothing as lovely as opening post taking out a survey card flicking through paper work to read the comment “found in bin”. Ewwwwwww!

Friday and payday! Best day ever, its now been and gone. It’s less amazing after you pay the bills.

Meeting room theft seems to be a constant problem these days. There a nervous people that hover for extended periods outside hoping the thieves will leave, those that simply walk in and tell them its booked (polite get the fuck out), those that knock first before kicking out the thieves, the mimers that never speak to the thieves but explain through the magic of mime that the room is booked, and then thieves themselves that are initially confident in their thievery and become more nervous as more people walk by, as they be the people that booked the room. There is then the other breed that begin long conference calls or presentations, these people are harder to move. On occasion they will not acknowledge the hoverer and at other times one will come out and explain that they can’t possibly leave as they’re right in the middle of INSERT CLIENT RELATED THING. I myself was a victim of a particularly heinous room theft. I had had the room booked for two months with more than ten people plus clients expected. A group of people from another department took the room, ignored my hovering and glass tapping. WANKERS! I’ve moved on though clearly. On a similar note a group of VIPs were squeezed into a tiny room this morning. Its rather humorous actually, looked like none of them have ever been in such a small room let alone for a meeting.

Why does Greenwich Picture house have to schedule the screenings of Shame at extremely early or late times its annoying. I was completely appalled by my sister in laws experience at a mother and baby screening the other day. Apparently it’s a common problem that the cinema let non mother and baby customers into the screening. As a cinema goer if I walked into a cinema with the lights on and women with babies I’d go ask for my money back. The delightful group of people that were in this screening didn’t do that. They sat at the back and watched the film, so of course Izzy had a bit of a scream. This is normal for mother baby screenings, so Hannah walked around with her trying to calm her down. One of the old ladies came up to her, we’re talking closer that normal social boundaries dictate and screamed at her. The general gist being that Hannah is being selfish and should get out. This was naturally upsetting and unnerving for her, then another mother piped up and said that she shouldn’t leave and had every right to be there. The screaming woman sat down and watched the rest of the film. The screaming woman also demanded her money back at the end of the screening, if she was that bothered she should have left. Hannah did get a free voucher for another screening, but it was a serious fail on the part of the Odeon and the screaming woman.

SAG Award dresses

Again Ariel Winter had the cutest dress

Kristen Wiig’s boobs seem to have disappeared in this dress

Berenice Bejo nice

Octavia Spencer much better than the globes

Angelina’s was dull to be honest

Kaley Cuoco FAIL

Jane Lynch love it

Jessica Chastain yummy

Ahna O’Reilly snooze

Regina King overfrill

Dianna Agron snooze

Quotes of the day

"I'm practically wearing skin" Overheard by Matt at London Bridge station

“   Top 5 Songs

Yeah Yeah Yeah- Date with the night

Velvet Underground- Heroin

The Gossip- Standing in the way of control

Ryan Gosling- You always hurt the one you love

The Velvet Underground- Venus in furs

Raging Rampage of the Cake Money Queen

The genius that is me fixed a database before I’d had my coffee this morning. Shame I didn’t do it before the programmer called in from his day off. Back to the amazingness that is my brain though, without coffee, before midday I achieved something that involves actual brain function.

So while in Tesco last night I was perusing the veg a man next to me doing the same, picked up some loose broccoli, turned it 360, sniffed and then went to put it back before realising I was judging him. He then put it in his basket and walked away. I picked up some broccoli and wandered off only to see the same man loitering at the edge of the veg isle. Whenever I go in Tesco now all I can think of is the man from Matt’s store where he wandered in naked and covered in shit.

Enroute to Tesco I passed by the exit to our basement from which a white van careered out with no care for the people in the road or the traffic. Given that someone has already been killed there you’d think they might drive slower.

Loving all the talk about the war on drugs at the moment. You get to read insightful pieces about how amazing mushrooms and other fun things are. I am convinced now that Mr Branson has some drug feels stashed somewhere since he has come out in support of more relaxed attitudes to drugs. A hundred years of the War on Drugs and every study shows that legalisation would make the whole process safer. I hope for the Layer Cake ideal of buying narcotics in the future where you’ll be able to by cocaine by Calvin Klein in the chemist. We could just revert to the early 20^th century model where you just tell them your name and address and then they give you heroin. Since alcohol consumption, alcohol related diseases and death are at an all time high

It’s a sad day when intelligent and relatively dirty minded people can’t come up with naughty euphemisms involving cake and icing. Wet, white, sticky….I could go on but really do I need to.

 

Third date and he walked her to the bus stop, he didn’t try to sleep with her! That sounds a bit wrong to me. He described her nice we’re torn between he’s just not that into her or he is desperately trying to play it cool.

13 films the Oscars missed

Tintin – Not worthy

Bridesmaids- Not worthy

Shame- They're stupid, stupid people with massive lapses in judgement and only a passing appreciation for stunning cinema

Drive- There aren’t words for how completely I disagree with this being left off the noms, up there with my feelings on best actor

We need to talk about Kevin- Released to long before the awards season

Carnage- Hasn't been a long enough gap since they tried to get Roman on his rape charge. Another six months and they'll start giving him awards again

Young Adult- Sometimes they're just stupid

Kill List- Tiny British film not really on the Academy's radar

Crazy, Stupid Love- Not worthy despite the killer cast

The Devil’s Double- Films about Saddam and his family are automatically excluded

Submarine- Tiny off beat British comedy not really on the Academy's radar

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo- Not worthy

Senna- Documentary with no voiceovers they just don't get it

Quotes of the day

Combi quote is today’s winner

“You’ll be alright walking to the bus stop, you look like you can handle yourself” Duncan to Kira (his boss) followed with “No I mean you’re scary looking” Later referring to this as “when I said you were an ogre”

“Do you really think I care about that? I would snap him up even if he had a humpback. CAKE AND MONEY.” Richard

“She’s not all haggis and battered Mars bars” Duncan

Top 5 Songs

Runaways- Cherry Bomb

Iggy- Lust for Life

Joan Jett- Bad Reputation

Kayne West Ft Jamie Foxx– Gold Digger

Stooges- Never Met a Girl Like You

Just to be nominated…….

I’d like to thank the Academy for making a pretty huge mistake in the best actor noms. What is wrong with you people? I get that there have been mass deportations of Latinos and they all want to appear liberal, but this just takes the biscuits.****  Write a letter to your congressman or write an angry blog but don’t just nominate the Latino actor for the hell of it. It’s a wishy washy film that has no place in the best actor category. Michael Fassbender in Shame has clearly been left out because INSERT REASON OF YOUR CHOOSING

a- Directed Steve McQueen (right off the bat this confuses them)

b- Shame is about sex addiction

c- Most of them haven’t watched Shame

d- They’ve just decided to further stack the deck for George

e- They threw some names in a hat and grabbed the first three that came to hand. I say three because they know they’ll never give it to Gary and they’re desperate to give it to George.

Answers on a post card.

My feelings on the other best actor noms this year they seem determined to give it to George even though the role/performance is not earth shatteringly amazing, Brad it’s a nice little performance but that’s it, Jean couldn’t not be nominated but he won’t get it, I think I’ve made my feelings clear on Damien’s nom, and Gary is doomed to be nominated till they give him his life time achievement. Annoyingly I thought Damien’s portrayal of Fidel in Che was top notch, so it’s not that I dislike him as an actor I just don’t think he’s a heavy weight yet.

My predictions and personal choices (who I want to win) will be available later this week.

A few wobbles on the tea front today. I’ve wanted a cup of tea twice today but I’ve managed to quash the urge.

I had one of those Mondays that drain all the energy restored from the Sunday morning lie in. Not really sure why it was an average day macro doesn’t work, data, phone calls, emails, data, pay claims and more data. Felt like a precursor to a long and relatively stressful week. Upside pay day on Friday, so the poverty of January will be over with. Tuesday has not faired much better on the work front. Although, it was so sweet when Dunc appeared with a cup of coffee that I hadn’t even asked for this morning.  I think Richard’s guilt trips have started working.

On another note the paranoia induced from a single look from a certain person is absolutely ridiculous. One of those things I should really get over but it’s a knee jerk paranoid reaction. I think a lot of it is to do with the angle that someone looks at you. Plus I don’t have anything to be paranoid about its just general neurosis.

Sherlock WOW. As a geek of the books I was so impressed with this episode, obviously Izzy decided to have a chat with herself while it was on so there was a lot of pausing. The most difficult pause was three minutes from the end and I had to wait for the muffler to be muffled. Can’t wait for next season!! Is there anything else worth watching on TV at the mo? Cause I can’t find it.

Final thoughts

I’d like to Ctrl+Z on a large portion of today.

To add insult to filmic injury the Orange Filmtogo free download this week is Vera Drake the worst Mike Leigh film ever nominated for a BAFTA.

I actually heard someone outside of my family say “as the actress said to the bishop” today

I had a very vivid dream about electric cars and woke up wondering why they beep like that, of course the beeping was my alarm.

Tea count: One cup on Saturday, I can beat this almost addiction without giving in to a higher power

Quotes of the day-

Unfortunately Adrien the quote of the day went to Helen.

“Old girls can’t get wet, they get flu you know.”

Closely followed by Richard

“I don’t know why people feel the need to dance around the fact that I’m absolutely gorgeous”

He then attempted to sing to which Laura responded

“It’s a good job you’re beautiful.”

Top 5 songs of the day

Iggy Pop- The Passenger

Lowkey- Soundtrack to the struggle

Adele- First Love

Pink- Just like a pill
Rihanna- Unfaithful ( I didn't enjoy it honest)

**** This rationale for the Academy’s insanity was bought to you by Richard Brophy

She Bangs

Drinking tea more! This is definitely a sign of ageing. No word of a lie on Tuesday I had two cups of tea and no coffee. Okay so this doesn't sound groundbreaking in terms of the volume of tea consumed but I'll give you some context. Baring herbal teas which don't really count, in my life I have never drunk tea. On occasion I would just say yes if tea was offered to save on the whole conversation about why I don't drink tea. Which lets be fair in this country is on par with having the "I'm an atheist" conversation at a dinner party where at least one person is religious, or just with people that don't like your succinct you're dead you're dead stance. Back to my point I would accept the tea.

My dearest dad drinks copious amounts of tea, he has a huge mug in which he has to use two tea bags think costa massimo mug size. He recalls fights of tiny hands (mine and my bro's) attempting to shove biscuits into his tea. Given the size of the mug and the fact that both our hands could fit into the mug, he ended up with a lot of biscuit in his tea.

I would say it was back in October at about 2am when I had deblued after Vanessa's birthday party that I first began this downward spiral into tea drinking. I had a scratchy throat and wanted a hot drink, in the cupboard was decaf tea bags (my dad's for when he comes to stay) so I had a cup of decaf tea before bed and didn't hate it. It kind of snow balled from there really. Most Saturdays are spent my bro's with the Izzmeister so tea is frequently offered and I have found myself drinking a cup a week since then. Drinking tea at work was a new low. I think it was mostly born out of not wanting to make another pot of coffee. Two cups in a day though has set alarm bells ringing, those of you reading this blog regularly will be hearing more about this slippery slope of tea drinking that I'm on.

Of course it's the tea that's the clear sign of me ageing, and not the sensible cardigans I've been wearing or the two loaves of home made bread I baked this week.

Moving on from tea if i can it's been a very long and draining week. Loads of work to do, good that I'm getting sleep but I do feel drained. Friday tomorrow which means the weekend. Babysitting on Saturday which is fun, hopefully the rash is gone so I won't be treated to two hours of screaming while I try to roast a chicken. I think that coupled with the incineration of my plastic sieve last week when I decided to cook broth, rice and wash my hair all at once shows that I should try not to do to many conflicting tasks at the same time.

The title of today's blog comes from my complete loss of musical taste today. I felt the need for some bouncy mindless pop music while I trawled through lots of lovely data. Once you hit Vengaboys, you know Aqua is never far behind, not quite sure where the link is but youtube felt that I would probably want to listen to Ricky Martin as well. So I did and instead of being buoyed up by music I found myself listening to the song three or four times because I'd forgotten how ridiculous the lyrics are. An example "when she moves she moves" obviously the suggestion is that she moves in a particularly provocative and rhythmic fashion. To me it just sounds silly. Another example "we're gonna rock this town alive" I assume is Latino pop for paint the town red. It could also be a line from a zombie film starring Dwayne (The Rock) Johnson that feels the need emulate the expert punning of Freeze in Batman & Robin. A key line though is "She reminds me that a womans only got one thing on her mind" the precursor to this is "No one ever looked so fine" should the line not then be "She reminds me that a mans only got one thing on his mind" ? Also the pathetic " Talk to me tell me your name" don't know about anyone else but that is a wimpy line that if I guy said it to you would not automatically make you want to give him your best moves on the dance floor and elsewhere. I have to say it, at least Livin La Vida Loca made sense.

Top 5 songs of the day
Vengaboys- Boom boom boom
Ricky Martin-She bangs
Ricky Martin- Livin La Vida Loca
Aqua- Barbie Girl
Destiny's Child- Bug a boo

Alpha

So this is my first blog. Nothing much to say yet just trying to get the hang of formatting and everything.

Quotes of the day-
"What you can't see can't kill you" Ann's tag line for the worst horror movie ever

"Here in the rest of the world we believe in free speech" Adrien's nicely naive statement about Europe in comparison to the US during a convo on SOPA.

Top 5 songs of the day
Little lion man- Mumford & Sons
Testimony- Logic & Last Resort
Metric- Blacksheep
Eagle Eye Cherry- Falling in love again
Ram Jam- Black betty